Admitting my depression or despair didn’t kill me and it wont kill you. Acknowledgement and owning our state of heart and mind is the beginning of renewal.
My fast paced world was about to end.
The following will illustrate how crazy I had become mentally and emotionally, racing the sun half way across the country.
I learned a precious lesson, you can’t beat nature, it will destroy your soul.
I stopped taking time out for myself. I reached a plateau inwardly and was hiding a deep anxiety like a beast in the wild hiding it’s wounds from the predators.
I had a professional life to protect and responsibilities to my family. There was no way I could show any signs of weakness. Smiling on the outside, beaming light wherever I was. Darker by the day did my anxiety hide, until I faced my worst fear.
Working against nature will always reap unhealthy results
My wife confronted me about my ongoing irritable manner in the home. I gave my best to strangers and crumbs to those I loved. You can’t hide from the ones that love you.
I decided to have a few days off which was against character; and go for a long drive into the desert.
From Perth, Western Australia Coast I headed 1700km East to the middle of the country. I stayed in the only motel for a couple of days to think my life over.
The only signs outside my desert motel window were, ‘don’t feed the dingoes’.
Not having any clarity of what I needed to do next, I set myself a challenge. I would race the sun 1700km back home across the country the following morning.
I gave myself a three hour head start at dawn. For eighteen hours I raced the sun and watched it eclipse me three hours before I could make it home.
I chased the unattainable and just like anyone who tries to beat nature, it will leave you in the dark.
Eighteen hours of competing with nature only to fail miserably, this was a picture of my life. I chased the unattainable.
I was forty five years old when I hit my wall, some do it earlier, many do it later.
It was the beginning of resetting everything about my life, an eighteen month process at a minimum.
The renewal was difficult, the rewards have been overwhelming.
3 Lessons to renewal
1. There comes a time we have to admit we can’t beat nature and we must look for the flow.
2. Taking all the time we need to renew by making incremental changes. Slow changes that last, just look at nature.
3. Acknowledge that all of life is seasonal and the desire for perpetual happiness is disastrous. Life is about ebb & flow.
Despair & Depression, they come uninvited
Depression & anxiety are unseen monsters that attack while no one is looking. Take time to reflect and know it’s not the end, it may be the beginning of the best days of your life.
It’s been many years since this trip which started a complete reset in my life. I thank God for the journey but I wish it (the mental anguish leading up to it) on no one.
Don’t not define yourself by your current circumstances, your best days are ahead of you.
When you’re ready to reset your life, let’s connect.
I’ve attached an opportunity that allows you to be yourself in a completely safe space over a three week period. The answers are in you, I just help you stay the course so your answers appear with clarity. This by all means isn’t meant to fix you but simply to give you breathing space to think and speak your mind without judgement.
The answer is in you.
If you are interested in a chat, message me on WhatsApp with the button to the right hand bottom corner of this page or email me direct on firstname.lastname@example.org and we can arrange to meet if you’re in Perth, Western Australia or zoom chat anywhere in the world.
Who knows what light could come from a chat?